cryptomail's Journal

First, and probably last post
I don't believe in Live Journal.
Usually, I don't have much to say that isn't either inflammatory, or not a cheese sandwich anyway.
The people I know and care about, usually know what I'm up to via other means.
But today, now, it's different.
I would like to publicly announce as far and wide, with as much reach as I can, that a good friend of mine died, and that I feel a deep sense of loss and wrong that will probably go unrequited.

Eric Tiedemann, or "est" as he goes on livejournal was found dead at his house, and the cause of his death is as of yet undetermined.

The nature of my relationship with Eric was interesting. Most of the time we talked about programming, our love of music, and community.
During the course of our friendship, we went to conferences together, and even joked around. This was the best side of Eric. He was one who could be engaged with his community, highly available to people, and be excited to be around them, and collaborate.

His undying love for high quality free software, and his awesome software engineering skills made him a true master.
His deep understanding of language and machine design was manifested when he crafted a dialect of LISP, called e7. In fact, in general, Eric was a doer, if he didn't like the state of something on the free software platform(s), he'd just up and write stuff that sufficed his interests, and share them.

This brilliance, while great, unfortunately was matched with darkness.

Eric at times was depressed, and he'd try to express himself. Sometimes, he did so online, publicly.
I, and others, tried very hard to help him confront his issues. I spent a lot of time online trying to get at his issues, head-on, so that he could be free from what I think was torturing him.
I have failed.
I tried and tried and tried, and here we are today, left with only questions, and no clear answers as to why Eric died.

This is the first time where I feel I've lost someone where I thought there was truly hope, and their life was unnecessarily cut short.
When talking with Eric, I always tried to instill hope into him, and be positive. Things he perceived missing were but a grasp away, and all it took was patience and some time. I want to say that again, but I can't.
It's too late.
I can't tell you that anymore, but I can still tell the world about you and say

Eric, I miss you.